MWF Seeking BFF: My Yearlong Search for a New Best Friend by Rachel Bertsche
Published: 2011 by Ballantine Books
Dear Ms Bertsche,
Having just finished your book, MWF Seeking BFF, I have only one thing to ask:
Do you have room for a 40 something woman living in the Chicago ‘burbs in your circle of friends?
I understand that your yearlong search (by going on 52 friend dates) was aimed at finding a friend of similar age in Chicago after having moved away from your two BFFs in New York to be with your husband. And I know that you had your own trepidations about such a quest; but to me you proved that sometimes all it takes is just to ask the question. Because though few people talk about it, it seems like many of us are secretly looking to make new real-life friends. I’ve lived in the ‘burbs for almost 13 years and outside of some work friends (which as you say isn’t quite the same thing) I don’t have anyone in the area who I can call for spur of the moment “girly” activities.
Why is it so hard for adult women (especially those of us without children) to make new friends? In childhood it was so simple, you walked up to someone in the classroom or on the playground, asked “Will you be my friend?” – and that was that. We lose that boldness as we get older, and I am impressed that you were able to gain that back and move outside of your comfort zone and find friends in so many ways, even when some of your friend dates did not turn out as you hoped.
I’m taking many of your ideas to heart and am going to make a concerted effort to find maybe not a BFF, but some fun people to have fun with. And if you are ever up in McHenry County, let me buy you a coffee.
(and check out Rachel’s blog too)